Askin' Shifra

Just like therapy- only free, unlicensed, and hopped-up on Hamentaschen and Manischewitz.

Monday, March 13, 2006

Questions I've been afraid of, part 2

Dear Ask Shifra,

I know you must get questions all the time, and are probably very busy at work and all that, but I would really appreciate if you could give me some advice on the following problem.

It's my oldest son...he's 11.

This is rather embarrassing for me as a parent, but I found him perusing a website filled with photos of Britney Spears.

Not wanting to overly embarrass him, I commented, "She certainly is pretty. Which picture do you like best?"

"I don't know," he mumbled, embarrassed by his newfound interest. "I'm just reading about her."

I came closer and peered at the screen. "Oh, really?" I said. "So when did you learn to read Spanish?"

What really irks me is that this isn't the first time I've caught him reading sites in Spanish.

With all the important messages we're trying to impart to him, it bothers us that instead of mastering other important skills, he wastes his time on Spanish. Any ideas how we can curb this now, before it gets out of hand, and starts detracting from other, more important things?

Thanks Shifra, I knew I could count on you.

Pasnisht in Lakewood.

Dear Pasnisht,

The answer is simple. In fact, I can’t believe you’re actually asking me. Via email. From Lakewood. I could understand the whole the whole Brittney Spears-Spanish thing being a problem if you were from, say, Passaic. Or even Tenafly. But Lakewood? Even my youngest daughter, “Chavi Kaufman,” could tell you the answer to that.

Unless you are running a home internet-related business, such as an online stock brokerage firm, or an out-of home internet shopping site, or a basement porn site, 10 out of 10 Lakewood rebbe’im agree, you shouldn’t have a computer with internet access in your home. While many rabbis and people and especially I might disagree with the ban, you chose to live in your community and OK, you stop at their stop signs and park no less than three feet from their hydrants, right? So I suggest you should lose the broadband. Not only would that keep your son from Ms. Spears and Spanish websites, it would protect him from “dangerous” sites like the New York Times and the RenReb as well.

Problem solved.


At 1:42 PM, Blogger wishiwerejack said...

I am trying to protect my kids from Spanish as well.

At 5:58 PM, Blogger Sabzi Aash said...

Spanish is a very dangerous interest. Next thing you know he'll be mopping floors, watching Argentinean soap operas, or chas v'sholom speaking Hebrew with a Sephardi accent.


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